Grumbly rumblings!!!!

Hi all,

Hope everyone is well!!! Im OK in general though still rather wheezy - my GP wanted to see me on Wednesday as when she phoned I was quite chesty - saw her and had the 'I dont wanna go in' debate for a while before we agreed a plan of action, which involves sitting it out and hoping things improve whilst taking the nebs 2 hourly-which is a bit of a pain!!

I had a dental appointment today at the local dental hospital - they were a little concerned for two of my teeth which are chronically infected with absesses causing me rather a lot of discomfort at the moment!! The dentist explained that it was going to be a long and rather painful process to sort the crown out :-( so I left awaiting the big appointment date with great apprehension!!!

I taught the piano to my youngest student yesterday and she is a little trooper bless her really does show great promise and she is only 2 years old!!! Her mum is going to help me out a bit with my garden and some cleaning and I am eternally grateful to this - without her I dont know what I would do!!!!

I got some great news yesterday also - I am receiving the high rate care and mobility component of DLA as of the beginning of February - so that will really help me!! I have been battling for a while to get this sorted but the forms are incredibly difficult and if I am brutally honest - I felt too rubbish to fill them in for a long while!!!

Soooo, Things are going OK here, Im still rather tired and fed up but I am doing OK!! I am rather fed up of doing nothing now and would love nothing more than to go back to the job that I love, however - this morning I received my P45 through so its all official now - I no longer have a job!! I am going to the appeal hearing in April where my trade union rep and myself will be again putting my case forwards to the management of the NHS - though in all honesty, I dont think this will come to much and I thoroughly expect them to have already decided they are not going to listen to the evidence!! I expect it will ultimatly end in tribunal but at least I am prepared for that!!

Anyways peeps - I am off to sofa surf once more - I will probably watch some mindless television before settling down to read a book - probably a text book on haematology as I am determined not to loose my knowledge as, if they say I can return to work I want to be as competent as I possibly can and show them all that I am good at my job and retain my knowledge!!!

Speak soon peeps, till then take care all,

lotsa lv Rattles Xxxx

A week in Costa Del Basidonia!!

Hi All,

Sorry for the gap between posts.... Things didn't really go all according to plan really!! After my last entry my friend clarebear and I went to bowling before settling down at the cinema in Basildon to watch 'confessions of a shopperholic!' I didn't feel too well when we were at the cinema but watched the film lol!! Cant remember what happened really but hey ho - I'm sure I will watch it again :-)

We had some dinner at Nando's before heading back to clarebear's for a night of telly - The comic relief kilimanjaro program was on which we both wanted to watch!!! Once at clare's I didnt feel that well and was struggling with my asthma, so we decided to head off to the A and E of her local hospital!!

Once there things did get worse rather quickly and I was taken through to resus and then promptly up to the ICU. Things did settle and after a few days I was on a normal respiratory ward, albeit - a long way from home!!

I was there till yesterday afternoon when I was released on the provision that I make a smooth escape back up north to my home town!! I booked my coach yesterday and arrived a few minutes ago - tired after a long day of travelling and looking forwards to a nice evening in my own bed!!!

On reflection - It was a rather rubbish holiday, however, it was made better by the fact that clarebear was so lovely and even surprised me with a visit from another AUK'er on the tuesday, it made my day when I saw them with KFC!!! :-)The experience was ..... Interesting and I dont think I have ever been told off as an adult like that before!! I did get a few cross words thrown in my direction about trying to be normal!!!

Anyways, looking back in heinsight (which of course is a wonderful thing!!) maybe it wasnt such a clever idea to do so much travelling so soon, but, thats what life is all about isnt it??? Learning things?? sometimes the hard way, and other times the easy way!!

I havent totally written off the idea of returning one day to visit clarebear again, however I think that I will make sure that prior to and after the trip I have nothing planned so that I can regain my energy and not overdo it!!

So - my plans for the next few days??? Im going to glue myself to the sofa!! I am having a few PJ days I think - followed by a check up at my GP on monday after starting on some new medication whilst I was in basildonia!! The tablets from what I can tell so far have helped me recover quicker from this episode and have also lessened the variability of my peak flows during the day which in terms of my symptoms has been quite noticable to me!!

Hope everyone is well and has had a good week. Speak soon peeps!! :-)

Lv Rattles Xxxx

The two fruitcakes meet up!!!

Hi all,

I caught the coach to clearbear land yesterday and arrived after 7 hours of travelling!! Clare and I dropped my suitcase off at her flat before taking a trip to the local hospital!!! She had a routine appointment lol!!! :-)

During the journey the coach got stopped by a police car near to London. We were taken off the motorway where there were about 20 -30 armed policemen with police dogs etc!! They came onto the coach made us all leave and walk in single file past one dog. The coach was searched and all our luggage was given a sniff by the dogs. We had to sit inside the service station whilst the police talked to selected individuals - they also gave us a leaflet about the counter terrorism unit etc!! Another dog sniffed our hand luggage which we were told to put on the floor in front of us!! It was all spectacularly bizarre and at the same time it made me glad the police were being cautious but also slightly unnerved that they felt there was a substantial enough risk to do so in the first place!!! We were allowed to carry on with our journey after 30 - 40 mins of their checks were all completed - weird or what???

When we got back we had some Chinese food and then had a small drink of alcohol mmmmm whilst watching random stuff on TV!! I'm quite liking the Heston Blumenthal programs at the moment - very very interesting even if the food does mess with your mind lol!!!!

We had an early ish night as we were both knackered after the days rushing about!! I went to bed at around 11pm I think but struggled to get to sleep and then was up every hour of so till 4am for a neb, did get some solid sleep between about 4.30 and 7am though I actually felt more tired for it lol!!!!

Had a nice bath and got dressed and straightened my hair etc - the makeup is on too as clearbear and I are going to watch 'confessions of a shopaholic' at the cinema this afternoon - we are also gonna grab some food from possibly nandos mmmmm!!!

Anyways from fruitcake land I wish you all a good day and will speak to you all soon.

lotsa lv Rattles Xxxx

Reflection of a great week!

Hi all,

I have been to my parents for a few days now I'm on my way back home. The second part of my journey there was a nightmare-we only just missed being involved in a 25 car pileup on the M61!! I met a chap called Damien on the way there-he seemed really nice. The coach got caught up in the traffic as the M61 had all 3 lanes closed, so I got chatting to damien on route! We eventually had to stop near chorley as the coach driver reached his driving limit and had to take a 45mins stop. We stopped near a pub so that was OK!!

Once we arrived in my home town I swopped numbers with damien and we arranged to meet again! The 'date' was ridiculous-he was asleep when I arrived as he and his mate were both plastered. I was not amused-dragged their butts to their hotel and left them to it!! I have had a few calls from him since but have ignored each of them as I didn't appreciate his behaviour on a so called date!

Anyway-aside my bad date and in total contrast I had a fab time at my parents. My nephew is getting bigger and gave me huge smiles :-D loved it!!

My brother, his fiance and I went out for a few drinks on saturday evening too which was great-my mum babysat :-)

Yesterday was my mum's birthday so we all headed off for a meal which was lovely - the little one slept all the way through as he is a little angel! I was so stuffed I did feel a little sick all evening lol! I then spent a few hpurs having cuddles with baby S before heading back to my parents house for sleep....

I'm now on the return leg of my journey - I have quite a wait in manchester again-not leaving here till 6.30pm Zzzzzzzzz!! It could be worse though lol - my friend finishes college at 4pm so is going to meet me afterwards to kill the last couple of hours of time!! The journey so far has been uneventful and not too bad-I dont mind journeys like that :-)

Anyway-Im only home for a day (and that is jammed full of appointments) before I flee again-this time to a friends-its going to be a rather busy busy week!!! lol. Will post again soon.
Take care all.
Lots of lv Rattles Xxxx

Another long journey...

Hi all,

Im on part one of my travels today, didnt sleep too well last night and woke a few times needing to neb but managed to get up on time for the latest epic journey to my parents. It again involves a large wait at manchester coach station - 4 hours this time...

Ive had some food and a coffee and chatted to random national express staff but now I am very, very bored!! I texted a friend earlier to say I could meet up for a few hours but think that she is unfortunatly for me probably in lectures! so the wait continues...

On the whole I'm feeling a bit better than I was first thing which is great, though I am very shaky from the nebs! I'm looking forwards to seeing my gorgeous nephew again and to seeing all my family-its been rather stressful the last few weeks so I'm looking forwards to the break!!

Anyways will post again soon but till then take care all,
Lv Rattles Xxxx

...on the road to nowhere!

Hi all,

So, Yesterdays meeting at remploy was great, gonna pop in next Tuesday and go through some job searches with the chap there so looking OK on that front! Yesterday afternoon I rearranged some appointments I am not gonna make due to being here there and everywhere over the next couple of weeks!!! I organised my neurology appointment for this morning, knowing that today was going to be particularly stressful and busy day anyway but hey ho!!

I got up at ridiculous O'clock this morning and caught the first of 2 buses into my local hospital! I arrived just 5 mins late for my 9.30am appointment to find that the stupid woman who told me it was today had made a mistake and it was really tomorrow - which I cannot do!!!! I spent a while on the phone to her with her giggling saying 'oh stupid me.... sorry' then we rearranged it for a few weeks time. Needless to say I was not amused! I have just returned home after the mad trek back home, made a cup of coffee and have a few moments to myself before my piano student comes round for an hours lesson! Then, as if it wasn't already busy enough today, I have to dash across to the other side of the city to the other hospital to get some results from the all important bone clinic re - my bone strength and possible osteoporosis!! My goodness, I am tired!!!

Anyways, don't think its going to be an easier day tomorrow either due to the early start and trek to the coach station to get back to my parents!! Ah well!! Least the chest does feel slightly better today so I don't have that to contend with too lol!!! :-)

Hope everyone is doing well. Speak soon all take care
Lv Rattles Xxxx

Sleepless nights...

Hi all,

After my marathon sleep yesterday I watched the finale of 'being human' at 9pm - which most definitely left me wanting to watch any potential new series... :-)

Anyways, after watching that and then 'family guy' I let the cat in had some cuddles and tried to go back to sleep, knowing today was going to be a particularly challenging day! I tossed and turned for about 2 hours the finally did get some zzzzz's, only to wake up at about 4am and I really couldn't get back to sleep!

I've spent the morning coughing and wheezing so far, which is not good!! I have had a few nebs which has settled things down and am debating what to eat for breakfast so I can take the all important morning dose of steroids! I have to try and calm the old lungs down before I head out to my remploy meeting later on! Got to be there at 11am but, I have to get a bus and a tram there so it is a fair old trek, its also not very warm out so I will be wrapping myself up in my hat scarf and gloves to go anywhere!

I phoned my GP up today to try and get an appointment... haha - next Tuesday - by then I will either be better or worse and in hospital!! Will see how today goes I think if I am no better I can always phone the good ladies at the community respiratory team - who are always great at helping over the phone or popping in to see how things are going! If that doesn't work I can always pop in to the surgery and ask to see a GP - though it will probably not be my regular GP - so I have options if things are worse later!!!

Soooo, I have a meeting today with remploy. This meeting is to look over my CV and interview technique (as I haven't had to use these skills in well over 4.5 years!!) and to help me write why I left my last job, mmm - that's a difficult one as I didn't leave of my own accord but through my boss being unreasonable and not allowing me to work part time but ho hum!!

I am going to chat about possibly getting some part time work (science based I hope) just to keep my knowledge up and get me back into the swing of things again as I have been off work now for just over a year due to my marathon run of admissions to hospital last year!! I cant physically deal with too many hours but feel I could do 16 a week (at least I think this is a reasonable target to aim for!!) I am not too bothered about loosing my incapacity benefit either if I can get the same level of money from working which I should be able to do if I am not working for the minimum wage!! On my previous job front -it is becoming very clear my boss had replaced me before I had my contract terminated due to the fact they are not advertising my post and have no intention of doing so in the future!! This will I hope come back to bite the evil man on his bum at the tribunal!! They still owe me nearly £6000 in agenda for change back pay and 10 weeks salary at my new rate - which I feel will be like waiting for the world to end as the trust couldn't organise a piss up in a brewery!!!

Anyway, onwards and upwards... There is a fantastic job vacancy at the children's hospital in Manchester, which I would love to go for but it would mean either commuting a long long way, or, relocating... Would also involve me having to work almost full time if not full time, which I don't actually think I can do! I am tempted however to scope out the possibilities of a part time post but will probably discuss this with remploy as they may be able to help me facilitate this. Think its either this or agency work which I could do as much or as little as I choose to do and still maintain my HPC registration which is very important as if I loose that it means doing the competency portfolio again and I don't think I could handle the stress of doing that again, seriously, once was definitely enough!!! Which speaking of which I really do have to find that folder.... mmmm!!!

Ah well peeps, I am going to have to sort myself out eat something then get myself to this interview.

Take care and speak soon
lv Rattles Xxx

Neglect...

Hi all,

I am really sorry, I have neglected my blog since the meeting at work and for that I am sorry. Since the meeting, I have seen remploy and in fact I have another meeting with them tomorrow. I have emptied my locker and my tray at work and I have stated the appeal proceedings. I have also booked a trip to spend from Wednesday this week till the 9th at my parents. I am back for a day so that I can catch up on various appointments and then I'm off to see a friend from AUK!! I cannot wait!

I am trying not to dwell on the fact I lost my job, more, trying to see it as an opportunity. This has been particularly challenging at times though as I really did love that job!!!

Anyway I'm going to have to make this a very brief entry as I need to do the washing and some cleaning and have a bath ready for the meeting etc tomorrow - this also means straightening the hair which can be a challenge in itself!!!

Promise to write again soon.
Lv Rattles Xxx